Jealousy
by HARRY.POTTER.QUICHE
Summary: James and Sirius pretend to get together to make their crushes (Lily and Remus) jealous.


**This story is for round 6 of the QL, of which I am Beater 1 for the Ballycastle Bats. I had to write about a light character feeling jealous.**

 **Prompts:**

 **(object) swear jar**

 **(word) pose**

 **(word) risk**

 **(dialogue) "I only came because I was told there was going to be cake."**

 **(dialogue) "Have I told you that I hate you recently?"**

' **And then there were two.' (The Quidditch Pitch)**

 **Polyphemus (The Percy Jackson Characters)**

 **The Sign of Four (The Game is on)**

 **Valentine-making Station: Heart, Cupid, Ladybug, Stars, Tulips, Black, Rhinestones, Gold, Red and Gummi Bears**

…

Remus, Lily and Peter lugged their bags through to the bottom of the stairs, James and Sirius trailing excitedly along behind them.

James' birthday was on Tuesday and so James had invited his best friends to stay at his house from Saturday so that there was no way they could miss his birthday. Sirius, of course, had been there already, having been living there for the past six months.

Remus dumped his bag on the bottom step, and took Lily's to place it on top.

"So," he said, turning back around to the boys, who looked like hilariously enthusiastic puppies. "How has your Easter been so far?"

Sirius and James shared a look, and Remus immediately knew something was going on. He had spent six years learning how to read these guys. He had learnt when to be suspicious.

"Oh, you know, good. Lots of chocolate." Sirius ran his hands through his hair and leant on the banister, in a deliberate manner. He wanted someone to ask. He did it a lot. James was not asking like he usually would, so was presumably in on it.

Remus looked at Lily, who was grinning. It was obvious that she was going to find it quite easy- and fun- to resist the temptation of asking.

Peter, however, looked like he was about to bite, and Lily noticed this.

"Oh, ours has been great! Remus and I made pancakes yesterday, and let me tell you, Remus is a natural tosser!"

Remus groaned, but couldn't help grinning at the look of annoyance of Sirius and James' faces. He loved that James had befriended Lily; Lily was one of his favourite people, and he was so glad that she could now be with them for their last year. He loved Lily as much as he loved the Marauders. They were his best friends. Being their best friends, he also noticed that one of the main reasons Lily was happy to spend time with them now was that she had an apparent crush on James. His friend's pathetic and (supposedly) unrequited love might finally have some hope.

Of course, he couldn't talk about pathetic unrequited love when he had spent the last year hopelessly pining over Sirius Black.

"So, when are Alice and Frank coming?" asked Lily, pushing James out of the way to go into the living room.

Sirius and James shared a frantic ' _what do we do now?'_ look before James fluffed up his hair and followed Lily.

"Oh, tonight. You'll be sharing a room with Remus and Peter. Alice'll be with Frank."

"Oh Merlin," Remus pretended to whine. "Not me again!"

Sirius laughed and patted Remus on the shoulder. "This is indeed very sad. I know everybody wants to sleep with me, but there's only one of me! I'm already taken. Speaking of which—"

"But he snores!" interrupted Remus, realising that Sirius had nabbed the chance to get a word in. "I won't be able to sleep for a week!"

James stepped forward. "Listen, guys—"

"Aw, Remus. You poor soul!" cried Lily dramatically, joining in the game. "Peter, why must you torture your supposed friend like this?"

Poor, bewildered Peter looked back and forth between Lily and Remus, before saying, "I only came because I was told there was going to be cake…" He was smiling confusedly at Remus. Obviously, he had no idea what was going on.

Sirius took the opportunity. "I'm dating James!" he yelled.

The silence was deafening. It lasted all of two minutes before it was replaced with guffaws.

Lily was leaning on Remus, and Remus was patting Sirius on the shoulder, both attempting not to fall over with laughter. Even Peter was propping himself up on the couch, chuckling away.

Sirius and James shared an awkward look and chuckled nervously. "Guys?"

Remus caught a breath. "Oh, Merlin. I thought you were going to tell us about a prank or something like that, but I didn't think you would _ever_ think you could get away with pranking us!"

"Um, Remus? This isn't a prank."

"Yeah, right!"

"No, seriously."

"You think we'd fall for that?"

"No, seriously."

"You guys are idiots."

"No, this is serious."

"No, it isn't."

"No, _seriously._ "

"… No? You're not? I mean, you're not seriously, like, actually, like—"

"I am dating James!" yelled Sirius again.

This time the silence went on for longer than a couple of minutes. They were completely serious? Finally, after what felt like days but was probably about five minutes, Lily spoke up.

"Are you really being serious?"

James took a deep breath. "Yes."

"I didn't even know you swung that way?" Lily posed it as a question.

"Well… I was alone with Sirius for a long time. I still like girls; I'm not completely gay, but, well…"

"Well, then," said Lily slowly. "We weren't going to tell you for a while, but… well, now that you are telling us about you we probably should. Remus and I have been dating for a while."

This silence seemed to go on for years. Remus' thoughts were whizzing around his head. James and Sirius? It was ridiculous! He shared a room with the both of them for years, and they never seemed to _like_ each other. But at the same time, it made sense. They were infinitely closer than Remus could ever wish to be with anyone. They were amazingly close. What if they were together? The jealousy ripped through Remus' chest. He had taken too long to tell Sirius about his feelings. He was too late, and Sirius had fallen for _James,_ of all people. If only Sirius had come to stay with him instead of James! Would he be with Sirius now? And even forgetting the jealousy, what if they broke up? Their friendship would be ruined and the Marauders would be different forever. Could there—

Wait. What did Lily say?

James and Sirius seemed to be in equal surprise.

Remus turned to Lily in shock. "Lily?"

Lily seemed to be taking the day completely in her stride. "Come on, Remus. We had to tell them eventually." She took his hand and Remus was worried his eyes would fall out of his head.

"Well." James gulped and they all sat there awkwardly.

"You are actually kidding me?" They all turned in shock to find Peter standing in shock. He seemed to erupt. "This is insane! This is crazy! This is mental! Whenever Sirius got a boyfriend or girlfriend and they hang around us, or someone flirted with you, Remus, or James, I thought there were going to be all these couples around and I'd be on my own, or one of you would leave, _and then there were two! My best friends!_ Two bloody couples! I'm officially a loner!"

He collapsed heavily on the couch. Remus laughed awkwardly and hoped everyone else would too and it would turn out to be a big prank.

"Well," said Sirius, nervously gulping. He put a hand on Remus' shoulder. "I'm happy for you guys."

This was the last straw. Remus' great crush of more than a year had just told him that he was happy he was dating someone else.

Remus pulled into himself. He nodded sheepishly; he made up his mind to not speak for the rest of the evening.

James and Sirius were acting normally but slightly awkward. Lily was being all couple-y with him. Peter was confused and surly. Remus wondered if this is what it would be like for a while. What was Lily thinking? How could they reveal that it wasn't true? Say it was a prank? Was it a prank? What was going on in Lily's brain?

Later, Alice and Frank arrived (together, although everyone pretended not to notice, except Peter who grumbled something about three couples). They were sat down immediately to explain about the two new couples. In response to the news, Alice blinked in surprise and laughed, similarly to Remus and Lily earlier, and had to be convinced it was real ( _which it wasn't,_ Remus complained silently), and Frank cheered for all of them , and laughed at Peter.

Remus was silent for hours, only speaking once to whisper, "Have I told you that I hate you recently?" to Lily.

At about eleven, after roughly six hours of pretending to be a couple, Remus and Lily were told to do seven minutes of heaven during truth or dare. He took his chance.

"Lily," he whisper-shouted, after being forced into a closet. "What the hell is going on?"

Lily blushed. "I'm sorry."

She drooped and Remus felt slightly guilty.

"Why did you say we were dating?"

"Well," Lily slowly explained. "I was jealous. You know I like James. And, I don't know… I wasn't thinking at all!"

"Maybe," said Remus thoughtfully. "Maybe, if they see us together, they might be jealous as well?"

"I was hoping that," admitted Lily. "That was what I was planning. It was only when I stopped to think that I realised what a stupid idea it was. I mean, what if they stay together? Then what? We stage a massive break up? But, did I just hear you admitting that you were jealous of James?"

"I never said that. But you just admitted you were jealous of Sirius so, yes, I guess I'm jealous."

The two sat there in silence.

"We're screwed up, aren't we?" They both laughed quietly, and then Lily leaned forward and hugged him gently.

"I'm sorry," She whispered.

Remus was just about to reassure her when the cupboard door was wrenched open by Sirius, and he and Lily sprung apart.

Remus didn't know whether he imagined the quick disappointed look on Sirius' face before he shouted, "Merlin, you were right, Frank! They were making out!"

"No, we weren't!" protested Lily immediately.

But Remus, right there and then, decided he was going to do this properly. Sirius had been disappointed and maybe almost jealous when he caught them supposedly making out. That had to mean something. He was going to do something about his feelings for once; he was going to take a risk, a leap of faith.

He threw his arm around Lily and chuckled. "Am I that bad?" He asked, smirking, and Lily looked at him in bewilderment and blushed.

"No! You're not."

"So, you admit you were snogging!" cried Alice triumphantly.

Remus held his hands up in surrender. " _I_ never denied it!"

That night Remus went over the top. He flirted with Lily and held her hand, kissed her on the cheek and, when dared to, let her sit on his lap all evening. The only time when he almost wavered was when he was told to kiss the hottest person in the room on the lips. But he managed to give Lily a peck without looking too suspicious.

He was tired by the end of that game. When he wanted to finally do something about his crush, why did he think snogging someone else was the best plan?

That night they all went up to their rooms. The plan was meant to be Alice and Frank, James and Sirius, and Lily, Peter and Remus, but they made a unanimous decision to split up the couples. Remus, winking at Lily, made sure she ended up with James, and Lily in return got him with Sirius. Alice ended up with Lily and James, and Frank with Peter.

Remus didn't speak to Sirius, except to say goodnight. He curled himself up in bed and fell straight asleep.

Remus woke the next morning to a very pleasant sight; Sirius was posing in front of the mirror in just his boxers. Remus watched him for a moment, before remembering the events of the previous day and looking away, going red. Sirius noticed.

"Checking me out, were you?" he asked, with a shit-eating grin. Then it fell. "Listen, Remus, I'm really happy for you and Lily. Even if it doesn't seem like it."

It took Remus' brain a few seconds to catch up. "Doesn't seem like it? What do you mean? Why wouldn't it seem like it?"

Sirius immediately went as red as Remus.

He ran out of the room, and Remus sat in bewilderment for a few minutes before he heard the call of "BREAKFAST TIME, YOU LAZY LUMPS!"

The rest of the day was pretty normal for the group, none of them acting very lovey-dovey except Frank and Alice.

Remus was starting to think that everything would settle down, when he got back to the house with Frank and Lily, having just been to the shop to pick up some double chocolate cookies. There was a lot of noise coming from upstairs.

"Fuck!" They heard James yell. "Oh merlin, fuck!

"Well, James owes the swear jar!" Peter chuckled, but Lily and Remus were looking at each other confusedly. What the hell was going on?

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck!" Sirius' voice joined James'.

Then there came some more swearing, a loud shout, a short silence, and then a long, slow groan.

"Sirius! Oh you actual… there is literally no word to describe you right now."

"Oh, God!" yelled Lily and Remus together. They sprinted up the stairs. They both skidded to a halt upon passing Alice and Frank, who were playing gobstones.

Before Lily could ask, panting, if the boys were _actually_ —

"Ooh, I wouldn't go in there if I were you," Mock-whispered Alice. "The boys are very, well, into it."

Remus and Lily shared another look, and then burst open the door. Sirius and James were on the couch.

"You did not just fucking blue shell me, Sirius."

Lily collapsed against the door frame in relief, and Remus could have laughed out loud.

"Okay, you win this one, but next up is Yoshi Falls, and you _know_ that this one is mine."

They were so engrossed in the game that neither of them noticed Lily and Remus attempting to get their heart rates back to normal. Remus watched his friends affectionately for a second, and then Sirius spoke, still having not noticed the two behind him.

"James, when are we going to tell them?"

"I don't know. I really want to tell Lily, but…"

"I know."

Thinking quickly, Remus grabbed Lily's collar and yanked her behind the sofa and mimed zipping his lips. Lily nodded slowly, ears pointed towards the boys.

"I mean, now we've fucked up everything- ha, sucks to you, Baby Peach- and it'll be so horrifically awkward to tell them now. "

Remus looked it Lily, eyes gleaming, to see her looking hopefully back at him. Did this mean what they thought it meant?

"Neither of them looks very jealous." They both laughed, almost sadly. "I guess I'm glad we said we were dating," continued Sirius. "They might have never told us otherwise, and then both of us would be hopelessly pining forever- who put that bloody banana there?"

"We're screwed up, aren't we?"

"Sorry." Sirius shrugged.

"Maybe, I know this is stupid, but hear me out: imagine if they did both like us back, and when we got together _they_ got together because they thought it would make _us_ jealous? Hang on, how come _he_ gets a bullet! He's not in twelfth!"

"Well, if that's the case Prongs, it worked. Their plan, I mean. I'm jealous as hell. Oh, come on, I just got back into third place!"

"Yeah, by pushing me off the track; you deserved that!"

"Well, you've been trying every plan to get Lily since second year. You really think that this one is going so well that she is trying to win you back?"

"Ah, I man can dream."

"He sure- was that you? You actual bastard!"

"Ha! Shouldn't have overtaken me!"

The two started to get back into the game. Remus started laughing. Slowly at first, then he fell onto his back, laughing silently. Lily looked at him, startled by his reaction.

Then a grin started to pull on her face.

In less than two seconds the two were rolling on a floor, behind a sofa, laughing like five year olds.

Remus snorted loudly and Sirius jumped and turned around.

The game was forgotten. Sirius screamed and James started. They turned to find their two respective crushes crashing around rather inelegantly on the carpet.

"What the hell?" cried James.

"Oh, you idiot!" giggled Lily, jumping up and kissing him.

Sirius blinked slowly. Then he turned to Remus with a look on his face which very clearly said ' _what just happened?'_

Remus laughed once more, then grabbed Sirius around the face and smashed their lips together.

Peter came into the room, looking confused as anything. "So how many couples are there now?"


End file.
